Shattered BeP

Committment

2009-12-30T16:24:00.000-08:00

So I've been contemplating starting the Couch to 5k program that my friend, Caitlin, has been doing. She loves it. I've been struggling with my ability to follow through. I started Weight Watchers and haven't counted points in weeks. I joined the gym and haven't been in months. I think 2010 is gonna have to be about sticking with things that I sign on for. 2010 will be the year of the follow-through!

Absence

2009-11-18T20:55:00.000-08:00

I was going to update this here blog of mine but I don't have any words right now. So... um... here's a picture:

Word to your mother

2009-09-17T20:53:00.000-07:00

So tomorrow I will be baking Lemon Bars, Chocolate Chip Cookies and Snickerdoodles. The Lemon Bars and Chocolate Chip Cookies were requested. The Snickerdoodles are a surprise. I've never made Snickerdoodles from scratch but I'm looking forward to it. I bought two new kitchen tools today. I bought a microplane grater (zesting action) and a cookie scoop. I will be using them both in my adventure in the kitchen tomorrow.

Broke.

2009-09-16T21:54:00.000-07:00

This is my cat. Her name is Star. She is approximately 13 years-old.About a week ago my mom took her to the vet to have two rotten teeth removed.

She didn't come out of the general anesthesia right away. She's coming around slowly.

My beautiful cat can't see. She can walk. She can eat. She can use the litter box. She is loud.

I had a dream last night that she was being as loud as she always is. Now, when I say she is loud, I mean it. I've been on the phone with people and they have asked what the ruckus is in the background. I usually respond, "Oh, that's Star. She needs my full attention."

Star is the best kind of cat. She's a cat's cat. She's aloof and only really likes my mom and me. She'll deal with other people but she likes it when it's just us.

She likes to sit where she can see the most activity. She generally hates when my mom and I are in the house at the same time but in different rooms. She can't monitor as well.

I really hope my little cat gets better.

Happy Birthday, Caitlin!

2009-09-15T21:31:00.000-07:00

Today is my friend Caitlin's 23rd birthday. We Celebrated Sunday night at our dear friend Marisa's house and had a fabulous time! Caitlin is the best and I'm very lucky to know her.

Soccer!

2009-09-14T19:19:00.000-07:00

My favorite 4 year-old had her first soccer game on Saturday morning. It was really awesome, she didn't want to touch the ball so she just ran after all the other kids. They don't keep score for the U6 teams, which is good since only the other team scored in the first half.

My best friend is the team mom. She's been waiting for this for 5 years!

In other news, sorry for not posting during the summer. I'll make up for it.

Road Trip, Day 2, San Francisco

2009-06-27T09:48:00.000-07:00

This is Lombard Street. It's the Crookedest Street EVER!

Road Trip, Day 1: Monterey

2009-06-25T23:34:00.000-07:00

We went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium and then took the 17 Mile Drive. Good times all around!

Icy!

2009-06-24T07:37:00.000-07:00

Since, I'm heading out on vacation this afternoon I'll leave you with this picture of Icy, my little brother's puppy. This was one of the rare moments she wasn't dragging me down the street on our walk.

blurple

2009-06-23T21:41:00.000-07:00

Curry a la Brynne

2009-06-22T17:13:00.001-07:00

This is one of my favorite things that I throw together in my kitchen. It is essentially firm tofu, onion (the on sale kind), green bell pepper, and zucchini over some brown rice. I usually cook the veggies and tofu with curry powder, salt, pepper, and my favorite flavor of Mrs. Dash. It seriously takes about 30 minutes to make and I don't have to deal with that annoying Rachel Ray in the process. It's tasty and filling and I usually get about 4 servings, which feeds me for at least 4 meals depending on my hunger level.

Cupcakes, Part IV: The Finale

2009-06-21T10:49:00.000-07:00

So these are the cupcakes in their final state. I don't really have much to say besides: Everyone loved them. The frosting I made yesterday morning tasted like Oreo filling.

Cupcakes, Part III

2009-06-20T09:13:00.000-07:00

So this is the frosting that will go on the cupcakes. I don't have much to say about except: Woo Hoo Frosting! It tastes really good.

Cupcakes, Part II

2009-06-19T20:51:00.000-07:00

This is the second round of the cupcake extravaganza. The cupcakes in the foreground are Flower Cupcakes (found here) and the cupcakes in the background are Chocolate Stout Cupcakes (found here). I used Young's Double Chocolate Stout instead of Guinness this time around. The results aren't as stout-y as they usually are but they are still just as rich. The Flower Cupcakes were something I hadn't made before (note the gross lack of chocolate). I think they are quite tasty and vote yes if you are making cupcakes for someone who isn't big on chocolate.

Cupcakes, Part I

2009-06-18T20:57:00.001-07:00

So, these are the first round of cupcakes for my dear friend Jessica's graduation party (she's getting her master's). The ones on the left are lemon cupcakes (from here) and the ones on the right are strawberry cupcakes (from here). I cut the recipe for the strawberry cupcakes in half since it was intended for a three-layer cake. I got 24 of each. Tomorrow I will tackle the vanilla and chocolate portion of my cupcake extravaganza. I'll post those pictures tomorrow. Saturday is frosting day and then Sunday I'll put up the final product.

Pants

2009-06-17T18:05:00.000-07:00

These are my favorite pants. Last night they got worn to The Wallflowers show at the House of Blues Anaheim. I've liked The Wallflowers since I was 14 years old. In fact, last night when they played "6th Avenue Heartache" I remembered falling in love with that song. The first time I heard that song I was watching "The Wallflowers: Unplugged" on MTV (before they stopped playing music) and I knew I needed to get their CD and listen to it until I was done. I'm not done yet.

Jakob Dylan is a man of very few words, which is quite the change up from the overly chatty Ben Folds. The show was amazing though. They played mostly old stuff with a new twist to honor their just-released-yesterday greatest hits album. All-in-all I had a really good time except for that part where my back started hurting so bad it hurt to stand.

Exhausted

2009-06-17T00:06:00.000-07:00

I don't know why all the pictures from Saturday look so surreal but I'll take it. I'm tired. See you tomorrow.

Icy

2009-06-15T18:08:00.000-07:00

This is my brother's puppy, Icy. This is from the walk we took on Saturday. She's tiny and dragged me all over the place. If you try to go faster so that she's not dragging you as much, her little legs speed up. I was trying to get her to sit still in the grass when I took this picture. I took some of her on the sidewalk but she kind of blends in with it.

Lovin' It!

2009-06-14T19:57:00.000-07:00

I've been getting right on top of flowers lately and enjoying the results of the blown out nature of the images I'm getting. I took my brother's puppy for a walk yesterday and this is one of my favorite shots from our adventure. I got a bunch more that look really unreal. I'm awesomely stoked on this one though.

Slacker

2009-06-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

Since I missed yesterday, to gets to be a two for one. These were taken at a Ren Faire about 5 years ago on my Canon EOS 300 using Kodak B&W 400 ISO film. This guy used to dress up as a huge Ent every year and I loved it. I have tons of pictures from this day and I love them all.

I'm heading down to San Diego today to hang out with the family. So tomorrow's picture will probably posted late.

Under the wire

2009-06-11T22:56:00.000-07:00

I took this picture a few weeks ago in my friend Josh's grandma's garden. I like that the foreground and background are blurred.

Ahhh... Phillips Ranch

2009-06-10T19:25:00.000-07:00

I took this picture about 5 years ago with my Canon EOS 300 on 400 ISO Kodak Black and White Film. It's a tree in the park in the park across the street from my old house in my old neighborhood. I always liked this picture and the last time I looked at it I was really pleased with it. I think when I get my own place I'm going to get it blown up and put it in my living room.

Orange Flowers

2009-06-09T17:01:00.000-07:00

I took this picture at the Getty about a year and a half ago with my old camera. A tiny little point and shoot camera that got lost. Looking at it now, it's not that great but I really like the composition of it.

Purple Flowers

2009-06-08T20:59:00.000-07:00

So, I'm contemplating doing some sort of 1x365 project wherein I post a photo everyday. I don't know how great they'll all be but I think I owe it to myself to give it a go and see if I can stick to it. Hopefully, I'll be a champ and get all the way through June 7, 2010 having posted 365 photos. We shall see. Wish me luck.

Bird with Three Heads

2009-06-04T18:53:00.000-07:00

The other day I went to for a quick walk to the liquor store to grab some bottles of Guinness for some Chocolate Stout Cakes I need(ed) to make. I noticed these crazy, HUGE black Bird of Paradise type flowers growing out of some palm trees. I made a point of making sure I made it back around the corner to get some pictures of them since they were so cool looking. Especially for the fact that 3 flowers grow out of one spot and it looks like a bird with three heads. As for the Guinness, I left my ID at home and couldn't buy it. I ended up buying some other beer. I may end up blogging about them. I have to try them first though.

I Bake Shit...

2009-05-31T21:53:00.001-07:00

So somehow at my friend's graduation party, I offered to make cupcakes for another friend's graduation party. I wasn't sure if I had actually done that until I got a text from her two days later saying that her stepmom wanted me to do the cupcakes. And then I asked the question that would seal my fate: How many cupcakes do you need? She responds with something along the lines of "Well 75 people were invited." That's right folks 75 cupcakes. My main concern was not my tiny kitchen or my tiny oven that I can only do 1 dozen at a time in or decorating them in a cute fashion. No friends, my main concern was transporting them in my precious car. I have to get them from Long Beach to Upland. Which ain't like going around the corner. No it's like going 50 miles. But whatever I got that sorted out. Although I also, volunteered to make a cake for a potluck at work AND another one for a birthday party. Ahhh.... it sucks to bake well. Wait, no it doesn't.

Growing Up

2009-05-25T19:46:00.000-07:00

My best friend, Bethany, graduated from college on Saturday and I couldn't be more proud of her for getting through it. Congratulations!

In which I ramble about my love...

2009-05-21T22:26:00.000-07:00

So roughly 24 hours ago I was being blown away by the awesomeness that is Ben Folds live and in person. The man is pretty bad ass. It's no wonder that he's my favorite.

About 4 hours before that I was feeling very awesome to have a friend who is willing to let me park at her apartment and then drive me to the Palladium AND come pick me up afterward. Marisa rocks my socks. If you don't know her you are missing out!

2009-05-17T18:03:00.000-07:00

I took this picture last month while I was in San Diego visiting my parents and little brother. We went to Balboa Park for a science fair (my brother LOVES science) and I had to have a seat since my stepmother told me I was walking like my dad. I have lower back problems and over the last three months if I stand still for too long my back will lock up and I have a hard time moving. It's pretty awful and no, I haven't done anything about it. Well, anyway I was sitting on a bench and the sun was right behind these palm trees.

'Tis better to have loved and lost

2009-05-16T10:28:00.001-07:00

Speaking as someone who had a very recent and strangely uncomfortable run-in with her ex-dude, I can honestly say that it's better to at least have experienced the love. I think there is a lot that can be gained by giving someone your love and allowing that love to do what it needs to do. The love changes the person who experiences it. It sucks to lose it but the growth it can cause is priceless.

Conclusions

2009-05-07T16:58:00.000-07:00

I was driving to work this morning and it occurred to me what my problem with most Republicans is. I feel like the majority of Republicans aren't willing to look forward. They aren't willing to accept the change that is surely coming. They resist and form this front of negativity. I don't fully understand why they are so hesitant to look at things from other view points. I can honestly say that I've looked at things from the other side. I've listened to people who don't agree with me. I don't always feel like I'm heard though. I'm not trying to make rash generalizations here. I'm simply stating the way I feel.

A friend of mine once told me that Bill Clinton scared her. I didn't understand that. Bill Clinton is not scary in my book. Sure he's a philanderer and then he lied about it. I don't think he really did much that was scary. He reformed some things that needed reforming. He was the great white hope of the 1990s. Scary, not so much.

I just wish that people had the ability to look past political affiliation and see that we all have a common goal: a better America; a better world.

Time

2009-05-05T19:33:00.000-07:00

I'm doing something that I can honestly say I haven't done in years. I'm sitting in my room listening, really listening, to a CD that I just purchased. I know it's not very current of me to still be purchasing physical CDs but I really don't care. Sometimes you need something to hold on to. So the CD is Ben Folds Presents: University A Cappella! It's making me really happy.

I've had a lot on my mind since this weekend. Saturday was a really great day until I saw the person who broke my heart. The fact that he reacted as badly to this encounter as I did makes me feel better. I'm glad that it's not only hard for me. I didn't speak to him. It's not necessary. I have nothing to say to him. I've recently stopped feeling like I need to apologize for taking the entire thing that transpired between the two of us. I don't need anyone's judgment for my feelings. Yes, I took it too hard. No, I wasn't the least bit graceful. Yes, I could have handled it better. I didn't. I wasn't. I did what I could with the tools I had.

I have a habit of not relying on people when I'm going through things. I tend to hold things in and internalize them. I'm probably partly to blame that things all landed on my head. I'll accept that but I'll be damned if I'm going to absolve him.

What I've been up to

2009-05-03T16:23:00.000-07:00

The picture above was taken around the corner from my apartment in Long Beach. That is corn. There is corn in Long Beach. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that one. Most people are find it quite as hilarious as I am. But seriously, corn?

One day I'll roll in a Volkswagen Thing

2009-04-21T19:32:00.001-07:00

Volkswagen Thing - front

For some reason, when I was a kid I thought that the Volkswagen Thing was the most amazing thing ever. They are ugly, came in crazy day-glow colors and looked like someone high decided to modify a Jeep. It was love. I don't see them very much these days but when I do, I get excited. I've been telling my dad for years that if VW could do something for me, it would be to bring back the Thing. I currently drive a Rabbit and I love it. Though, I can't help thinking that I would love to own a Thing and name it Cousin It. Ahhh.... I dream big sometimes.

Leave a party if...

2009-04-19T22:51:00.001-07:00

I've been to a lot of parties that have devolved into messes. I'm not a fan. I don't prefer to go to parties that don't include people I'm related to.

Vomitting from others
There's a good chance that I would feel obliged to help clean up the mess if it was one of my friends that was sick or it was one of my friends house.

Fighting
Whether involved in the fight (or shouting match) or just present when it starts. It's best to head out either way. Then you aren't the crazy yeller OR the observer.

General presence of crazies
I'm just not a fan of crazies.

Slackered BeP

2009-04-19T15:58:00.000-07:00

So I haven't updated in some time. I've been LAZY. I got my flickr sorted out. My Getty pictures are there (well the ones that I really liked). I am going to upload some stuff from last weekend with my mom. I was a lazy ass and really only took pictures of Star, Charlie and the puzzle I spent my down time putting together. It was one of those weekends away. I didn't take a picture of the cake I made but you can find the recipe here. My cake looked like that minus the powdered sugar on top. It tasted AMAZING and made me remember why I love butter. Last night was my uncle's 60th birthday. The party was at my cousin's fabulous house in Valley Village. A good time was had by all. I love my family they are so great. This morning I woke up bright and early to go see my dad and his best friend before they went to the LB Grand Prix. I'm currently comtemplating going on a photo adventure outside. It's beautiful out there today. I actually think I'll go do that.

Sorry this was so scatter-brained...but I'm rather scatter-brained.

I demand A Better Kitchen

2009-03-27T16:36:00.001-07:00

A Better Kitchen
I wish that I could upload a photo to this post to illustrate the teeny-tiny-ness of my kitchen. There is approximately 6sq.ft. of counter space and the space to move around in is crazy small. I bake A LOT and having no space to do it is making me insane. I want a bigger kitchen!

The Bucket List

2009-03-24T17:39:00.001-07:00

Visit ALL Pro-Football Arenas
Since deciding that I needed to take interest in a sport and my obsession with football developed I've been to three pro football games. This past fall I decided that I wanted to visit every pro football arena. I would also like to see every team play live (which of course means staying in New York for two weeks since the Giants and the Jets have the same stadium). I think my mom said it best at the Eagles v. 49ers game this past fall; "Football is so emotional. More emotional than any other sport."

Sell a photo
I don't know that I would want photography to be my main source of income. I feel like that would some how cheapen it for me. I would like to maybe get a photo into a gallery and have it sell. That would be enough for me.

Finally see The Wallflowers or Jakob Dylan
It's never worked out that I have been able to see The Wallflowers perform. 4 years ago they were in San Francisco the day I was getting back from Europe and the next night they were in LA when we were driving back to the bay area. Jakob Dylan was playing in San Francisco the night I was flying up. While I was in the air he was probably taking the stage. It may just not be meant to be.

Raise $25,000 or more for a charity
I don't know what the charity would be or how the fund raising would be achieved but I would like to spearhead something that moved people enough to open their wallets and give.

Bake a Wedding Cake
I just really want to say that I've done this. Who knows I may just make my own when the time comes.

Ownership

2009-03-22T21:54:00.001-07:00

Lately, I've been all about ownership and being accountable for the type of person you are in the world. In that I've super accepting of my short comings and things in which I don't always excel. I've accepted that I am sometimes closed off with my emotions and whom I choose to be open with. I have owned up to my inability to be forthcoming with how I feel about certain things that other people do. I've accepted that I'm not always a great friend or perfect communicator. I am trying to be a better version of myself. I want to improve as a person and as a part of that I must be responsible for the energy I put out into the world in all my interactions.

Reason Enough

2009-03-22T20:43:00.000-07:00

If you ask me, which you will, this picture is reason enough to love Los Angeles.

They helped me, maybe they'll help you

2009-03-13T16:46:00.001-07:00

I'm not one for assigning too much significance to a song. My ex and I never had a song. So there aren't really any songs that I can't listen to. I got over my issues with the one song that did upset me. These songs are songs that I listened to a lot post-break-up and they made me feel a lot better.

Another You by John Mayer

"I hope she looks like you, yeah, and is nicer, too"

I Don't Love You by My Chemical Romance

"I don't love you, like I did yesterday" I think that says it all.

Still by Ben Folds

"Even the things that seem still, are still changing"

Accidental Sacrifices

2009-03-08T16:39:00.000-07:00

Lent started a week and a half ago. When it started I decided I wasn't going to give anything up this year. I was feeling very far away and detached from my faith and my Catholicism. This morning when I was sitting in my room before heading to mass, I realized that I gave up being lazy. I am currently in an immense amount of back pain. Walking around, sitting, standing, and driving all cause the sensation of daggers being dug into my spine. It's awful. As I was sitting in my room I realized that last Sunday I got out and bed and went to church on my own for the first time in a very long time. So long that I couldn't remember the last time I went to church by myself. This morning I was tired. I was feeling lazy. I decided that I had accidentally given up being lazy. I took my very sore body to church and the grocery store and took care of my soul, mind and body. I've started working out and paying more attention to what I put into my body and how my body reacts to it (that's a whole other post for another time). I think in this whole giving up on laziness is going to have to extend beyond Lent (which is the point). I'm going to make it translate to other parts of my life.

What I baked this weekend: Oatmeal Cookies

2009-03-03T20:02:00.001-08:00

So over the weekend I baked another batch of the Chewy Oatmeal Cranberry Chocolate Chip Pecan Cookies. The base of the recipes comes from this recipe off of Smitten Kitchen. The only thing I really changed was that I took the raisins out and replace them with that litany of other things. They've been a huge hit at the office. The first batch was killed on Monday last week. So this weekend I doubled it up. Apparently, they taste different and are slightly more chewy this week. I think they taste the same but I think I'm biased. Without much ado here's a picture:

The first batch had the Ghirardelli 60% Cacao Chips. This batch had about 25% of those and the rest were Nestle Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips. Personally I'm a fan of the Ghirardelli Chips. I think the chocolate is just better quality. That could possibly be the reformed San Franciscan in me though.

Another thing I'm super excited about is that the picture above was taken with my new camera. It's a pretty rad camera and I can wait to really take it out for a test spin this weekend. Marisa and I are planning to hit the Getty soon. I love the architecture, rotating photography exhibits and flower gardens at the J. Paul Getty Museum (can't seem to link to it).

This week is shaping up to be quite similar to the last two weeks work wise, so I'm pretty exhausted already. I'll survive though. I think I may take myself on a small trip soon and spend some time in the bay area for more than a weekend.

The story behind the gold frog

2009-03-01T15:03:00.001-08:00

I got this gift for my birthday or Christmas (sometimes it's hard to remember, my birthday is two days before Christmas). It's a gold frog from Pier 1 Imports. My best friends, Amy and Justin, gave it me. I guess that they thought I was serious when I said it was cool. Justin manages a Pier 1 store, so I'm sure that's also part of it. I went to visit him one Saturday and commented that I thought the gold frog was badass. When they gave it to me I was mostly confused as to why someone would buy another person a gold frog. It now lives in the curio cabinet that my aunt gave me when I moved into my apartment. I am kind of attached to it now. My dad said it looks like Kermit the Frog in gold. I responded and said, "Well, it ain't easy being green."

I like to Wii Fit

2009-02-16T17:01:00.001-08:00

I'm not the biggest fan of exercise. I'll take a walk when I feel like it. I usually go up to the grocery store or to the Starbucks by my house.

I try to do the Wii Fit everyday. I usually start with my body test so I can bummed out about my BMI (which I don't actually thinks means anything). Then I do boxing. Today I decided I'm going to at least one exercise from each category (Aerobics, Balance, Strength and Yoga). I don't know if it's working but it makes me feel better about spending most of my time inside these days.

Winner

2009-02-12T14:27:00.000-08:00

At lunch today the discussion was what one would do if they won the lottery. It's pretty cut and dry what I would do and very little has changed about my answer in the past 5 or 6 years. Without ado here's the list:

Buy a house in the same neighborhood my apartment now is in. I honestly think I'd be quite happy in a small single level craftsman style home. I like them.
Pay off my bills: car, student loans and credit card (then destoy it).
Pay off my parents houses. My mom's house in Northern Cal and my dad and stepmom's three properties here in Southern Cal.
Pay off the loans my mom took out to pay for my going to USF.
Pay off their car loans and/or get them newer/better cars than they have now.
Either buy or lease a space to open a bakery and coffee shop.
Send my parents on vacation to wherever they want to go.
Take a vacation to Greece for who knows how long.
Give my dad and stepmom enough money for my brother's college tuition and room and board. That way they won't have to worry about it.

Essentially, I want to make my life as well as my family's lives easier. If I had a husband then his wants would be satisfied and we would take care of his parents and siblings also. It is my belief that all people should be able to pursue their bliss if given the option. I would want to do whatever I could to make this possible for my loved ones.

A word of advice from my dad

2009-02-11T17:48:00.001-08:00

My dad often gives me the weirdest advice. My favorite was when I was mad at someone for doing something I didn't like. I told my dad about it and he says to me, "When people are treating me like shit, you know what I do? I say 'Aw, fuck 'em'." Another thing he once told me was, "Eh, piss on 'em." Those two statements pretty much sum my dad up. He's a nice guy and he hates when people take advantage of that. I can't say I blame him.

Things I do

2009-02-10T20:33:00.000-08:00

There are a lot of things I do that cause me very little shame:

I watch American Idol and America's Next Top Model. I didn't start doing either one of these things until I moved back to Southern California and into my dad's house. My stepmom is a big fan of both shows and I started watching with her. I'm now hooked and I'm glad that when I go visit them this weekend, I'll get to chat with her and my step-aunt about this week's episode. (That is, if they had time to watch. If not I'll make them sit down and watch.) Also our old neighbor does the back-up vocals for Hollywood Week.
I listen to country music. I enjoy it. I listen to Go Country every morning on the way to work. I think that Shawn Parr is funny. I'm a big fan of music you can sing along with and country satisfies that need.
I sometimes talk to myself when I'm out shopping in the grocery store or Target. It's just something that happens.
I also talk to strangers in line at the grocery store or Target. This is something my mom does. I used to think it was annoying. Now I do it all the time. I'll just start talking to people. It may be about something they are buying or really anything. I'm a talker. My mom is a talker. Hell, my dad is the King of the Talkers.
I trip over things that just aren't there. On Sunday I was walking into the kitchen and my right foot slipped forward and I came crashing down on my left knee. It now has a bruise. I've hurt myself the three out the four last weekends. First, I sliced into my thumb causing the geyser of blood. Second, I burned my hand bad enough to warrant a blister. The knee was number three and it was in all honesty the mildest since it didn't start hurting until last night.
I watch Gossip Girl, 90210 and Privileged. Yes, they are aimed at the 13-16 set but I don't care. They don't require that I pay a whole lot of attention and I think my need to watch Heroes and Law & Order more than makes up for it.

I think that's it. There are probably more but I can't think of them or I'm not willing to share them with the internet at large.

Brynnie-Poo-Poo-Head

2009-02-08T11:06:00.001-08:00

For some reason, everyone I'm close to in my family calls me Brynnie. The story goes that when I was little and at my Aunt Lucille's house, I was majorly grumpy. (Not surprising, I've spent most of my life being grumpy.) I guess she started calling me Brynnie Poo Poo Head. When I turned 18 she said she was going to stop. She didn't and I don't really care. I find it rather endearing. I guess it's just one of those things.

Sidekick Brynne to the rescue!

2009-02-07T13:29:00.001-08:00

I generally consider myself the witty sidekick. This is mostly due to the fact that I am a witty sidekick. I'm the friend that is mostly cynical and beyond honest. Sometimes it's just a matter of telling my friend's to take the step forward. I like to be the voice of reason and the voice of crazy. It works for me.

A Dear John Letter

2009-02-07T12:23:00.000-08:00

Dear Sushi,
I had really hoped our reconciliation would go well. The problem is that I really want to be with you but my body says "No!" I wish that we could at least be friends but I think I can only be friends with the non-fish part of you. Rice, avocado, cucumber, seaweed we can still be pals and I can enjoy you to my little vegetarian heart's content. But fish... I have to let you go. It hurts my heart but mostly it makes my stomach and digestive system feel better to know that you'll be gone for all days. Hopefully, in the future we can become friends again. But for now just know: it's not you, it's me.

Affectionately,
Brynne

Yellow Rose

2009-01-28T21:26:00.000-08:00

This is a picture I took with my Canon EOS 300 SLR. It's one of my mother's rose bushes she has lining the side wall of her house. My mom has several really well tended rose bushes around the house. Roses remind me of my grandmother. I don't really know why, but they do. I really like this picture. It's one of my favorite mostly because it was a happy accident and I'm sure I took about 15 pictures of Charlie in the middle of shooting the flowers.

It's Tuesday!

2009-01-27T20:28:00.000-08:00

I took this picture about a year and a half ago at the Getty. This is actually the corner of another picture that I may or may not post. I'm leaning towards not.

Understanding

2009-01-26T07:47:00.000-08:00

I have this desire to understand Republicans. I mean truly understand how they could stand behind George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, John McCain and Sarah Palin. I want to grasp at what they are gaining and who they are protecting by not allowing homosexuals the legal right to marry. I want to understand how these people gain ground. I don't get it. I really want to understand. I want a reason that is outside of the religion arguement. I want to hear something that goes beyond "Democrats are just wrong". I want a fully realized argument about why healthcare is not something provided to ALL American citizens. I don't get any of it and I would really like to. I haven't heard a valid argument for any of it. All I've ever heard is bashing. Granted that same bashing led me to vote for Arnold Schwartzenegger in the gubernatorial election over that ass hat Phil Angelides.

I'm not a fan of mud slinging or catch phrases. "Yes we can" is awesome; unless we don't. You can't say that or "maverick" repeatedly and possibly think you have an argument. You have to back up what you say.

I think ultimately what I want is someone to sit down with me and in the most non-partisan, unemotional way explain to me what the Republicans stand for besides religion, money and guns. When it comes down to it, I don't know a whole lot about them. They confuse me. I am not related to any Republicans (that I know of). I don't have any friends from whom I can gain insight. I don't want to argue about where Republicans and Democrats are right or vice versa. I want someone to educate me in a calm way. A way that is non-accusatory and non-threatening. I don't want to push back. I want to be able to sit still and listen politely and keep my big mouth shut when I don't agree. For this conversation should be held in the spirit of greater understanding with the ideal that from it both parties will have greater understanding of the other.

I once took a class called Jewish-Christian Relationship. Basically, what we discussed for one whole semester was the differences of the two religions. What we found is that they are more alike than they are different. I like to think of the various world religions as thus: taking different routes to get to the same place. So I feel like this same principle can be applied to politics. That we are all traveling this path towards a better country, a better world but taking different paths to get there. We may not always agree but our paths will cross and if those crossing can be as peaceful and easy as possible then maybe we'll get their a little faster.

Here's to a non-partisan America.

Beast People

2009-01-24T08:41:00.000-08:00

I've decided that since I'm minus a camera at the current time (well not really I have the film camera and film), that I'd go ahead and start posting some older stuff that I have on my computer and external harddrive.

I took this picture about 5 or 6 years ago at the Ren Faire. They are these people who essentially live as wild people for the entire run of Ren Faire. It's pretty awesome. I did some post effects today. I'm pretty happy with what I got. I really like this picture. I think it's rad. But then again I took a whole roll of film of these people and was satisfied with almost every one of them when I loaded them onto this computer a couple months ago.

Bright Spots on the Gloomy Front

2009-01-22T17:12:00.000-08:00

I am the gloomy front BUT I some things are making the gloom glow a little brighter:

- Coffee with Miss Marisa and maybe Caitlin and David! I haven't seen them in two whole weeks. I miss them all!
- Kaleb was born today! I'm going to visit on Saturday. He's a damn cute little one.
- Barack Obama and Joe Biden were sworn in two days ago. Hope just keeps on rising up.
- It's Thursday, which means tomorrow is Friday. That means that this work week is over.
- Jury Duty starts on 2/2/2009. I liked it the first time I served. It made me feel like I was a part of the process. I'm a nerd.
- The Super Bowl is almost here. That means I get to see my friends and watch the last game of the 2008 season. I don't count the Pro Bowl.
- I'm pricing the Canon Digital Rebel XSi. I'm going to get on by summer. I've decided.
- I'm going to Italy to see my Annnnnne! I love Italy. I love real vacation.

I'm trying to look up, since all I really want to do is bury my head in the sand and hide.

in defense of car salesmen

2009-01-16T07:01:00.000-08:00

My father has been in sales since he got his first job at 16. He's been selling cars since he was in his early 20s. I've grown up around car sales. My first job was as an evening receptionist at a car dealership my dad worked at. I know what people think of car salesmen. They are smarmy and only want your money. In the case of my father and some of his best friends in the business, they aren't that way. I have met some smarmy carsalespeople (women sell cars, too, and they are MEAN) but I noticed that most of them are just people you wouldn't want to talk to anyway.

One thing I've always hated was people going to car dealerships and getting upset (read: pissed off) that the salesman doesn't want to take them on a test drive. Um....duh. If you aren't going to buy the car then you are essentially wasting their time. Test drives take about 30 minutes when all is said and done. In that 30 minute window someone who is more serious about buying a car can come in and go buy from someone else or go to another dealership altogether. I've been on exactly one test drive in my whole life. I test drove my Rabbit and knew I wanted it after I got around the first block. The whole thing took about 10 minutes. I didn't want to waste my dad's friend's time since I wasn't getting the car that day.

The other thing I hate is when I was little and people would come in right when the store was closing and my dad would stay sometimes until 10:30pm with these people and not sell them a car. This is what car salesmen call a "nightmare" customer. They are the ones who waste precious HOURS of your time with questions and repeat test drives and the like only to go to another dealership.

Did you know that car salespeople work on commission? Well, they do. If you dick them around and cost them money, they aren't going to be happy. That's the way it works. Car salesmen are people, too.

Well!

2009-01-13T09:39:00.000-08:00

I had a thought and I was totally going to post about it BUT it has left me. It's gone. Oh well. C'est la vie!

Here is something I was thinking about yesterday, though:

I've decided that I'm going to pretent I am ready to date. This stems from a conversation I had with some co-workers last Friday. Basically the jist of the conversation was "Fake it 'til you make it." So I'm just going to act like I'm not an emotional wreck 90% of the time and put myself out there and do the stuff that I like.

Basically, I'm going to try to make 2009 the year of positive thinking. I'm trying to be less negative, smile more, laugh more, and love more. I feel like what you put out there is what you get back. I've lived most of my adult life (all 5-8 years, depending on how you look at things) being a grumpy Gus, an Oscar the Grouch, if you will. I'm pretty tired of it.

I'm trying to avoid those things that make me feel poorly or negatively about things. Unfortunately, that has caused me to not seek out some of my friends. We shall see if that changes, but quite honestly they aren't seeking me out either. Such is life, I guess.

I've really changed in the past two and a half years. I think some of it is for the better and some of it was for the worst. For instance, I've become more positive but I've stopped going to church. I feel like one of the steps I'm going to need to take for myself is getting myself back into church. I don't generally feel God's presence when I'm there though and I think that's the disconnect. I used to feel something everytime I went and now it's like a void. I don't know. It hasn't hampered my belief in Him or His son or His spirit. It has, however, crushed my faith in humanity. I occassionally see random acts of kindness. But more often than not, I am seeing people judging others, being mean, laughing and ridiculing people and generally not being very good.

The other problem I've been running into is this: who am I to say that my way is the only way and that everyone who doesn't believe what I believe is wrong. In their minds, they aren't wrong. I think that essentially we are all going different routes to achieve the same thing. To find paradise, heaven, etc. So in that instance, is it right for me to act superior to my non-Catholic Christian brothers and sisters? I think not.

stupid shit that has been on my mind

2009-01-12T12:09:00.000-08:00

I want to tell people about my blog but I don't want anyone to know about it. Figure that one out for me, will you?
I want a twitter but I don't think I'm very interesting. Or really interesting enough to have a twitter.
I don't think the Eagles are going to win on Sunday. That has been my attitude most of the season. I think it's helped them. I'm not saying that I think they will lose, I just don't they are going to win.
That being said: I really want to see the Eagles in the Super Bowl. It's Donovan's Time!
I wish I could make myself leave the house long enough and cute enough to meet someone interesting and make a friend. But I suck at making friends. That's why all the friends I do have are old friends or I met them through other people. The only friend I've made on my own crazy merrit is my best good one.
Shoes. Really that's all.
I should use the Wii Fit more but I'm lazy. That's a problem, huh?
I hope I find somewhere to have chili for super bowl. I think I found recipe that doesn't suck and that people will like. I've got a cupcake plan (brynne=dork!) and I'm ready. I just need a space. I wish I had my own personal bigger space but I don't.
This is really disjointed. I'm going to stop.
Have a loverly Monday.

Wake Up Call

2009-01-09T08:04:00.000-08:00

1. Put your iPod/iTunes (or MP3 player) on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag friends.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Queen - We Are the Champions

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Mos Def - The Rape Over (really?)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Lorerra Devine - I Miss You Old Friend

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Jordan Sparks - God Loves Ugly (based on the title alone, that makes sense)

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Daughters of God - Daughters of God

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Boyz II Men - Doin' Just Fine (wow. That just about sums it up.)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Joaquin Phoenix - Ring of Fire (Yeah. Thanks.)

WHAT IS 2+2?
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Blood Sugar Sex Magik (well....there are 4 words in both the band name and song title)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Lifehouse - Wash (Hmmmm.....)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Alan Jackson - There Goes

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Fleetwood Mac - Say You Love Me

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Usher - Hottest Thing (ahahahahahaha)

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Sublime - Wrong Way (ehehehehehe)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Rich Mullins - Nothing is Beyond You (if I have a wedding...this won't be what is danced to)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Relient K - Staples (um....i hope not)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Heart - Straight On

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Scott McKenzie - San Francisco (Be Sure to Wear Flowers in Your Hair)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Queen - Crazy Little Thing Called Love

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Mariah Carey - If It's Over

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Cody Chestnutt - Brother With an Ego

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Usher feat. Lil' Jon - Yeah!

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Ray J - Feel The Funk I...(Intro)

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Jaci Velaquez - Speak For Me

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Seal - Hey Joe

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
The Distillers - Distilla Truant

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
My Chemical Romance - Famous Last Words

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Whitney Houston - Until You Come Back

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Warlocks

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Relient K - Wake Up Call (Well, ain't that profound?)

Wednesday: A Follow-Up

2009-01-08T10:44:00.000-08:00

So yesterday when I got home my apartment was a little chaotic. Here's what I walked into. I got into the courtyard and the front door was open (whatever, roommate was home). I walked into the apartment and his bed (read: twin mattress) is standing up and leaning against the wall that separates the kitchen from the living room. I walk further into the apartment towards my room and am confronted with my roommate's girlfriend (whose name I still cannot pronounce) cleaning the bathroom. That's right folks, this woman (who does not live in or to my knowledge spend very much time in my apartment) was cleaning the bathroom. We only have one. It was weird. I had to pee, so I asked if I could get in the bathroom and the response was thus "Of course! You'll be happy it's clean!" Now I knew the bathroom was filthy. I gave up. My roommate is a man. He shaves and fails to rinse the sink on a damn near daily basis. It's one of the things I've chosen to over look since he does not require that I converse with him ever. So I pretty much went about my after work business. I did my Wii Fit time, made my dinner (Indian food and rice from Trader Joe's), watch Made of Honor again and chilled out.

Marisa, Caitlin and I (and David, hubster of Cailin) were supposed to get hookah last night but our hookah place (lovingly referred to as Little 909) was not open. So we decided to hit up Polly's, our favorite little coffee shop in Belmont Shore. Bah! Polly's now closes at 8pm and not 9pm like the did the first time we went there. So we sauntered (giggling) down to the nearest Starbuck's and grabbed a table to chit chat and drink coffee (soy hot cocoa, soy latte and soy chai) and eat my tempura(!). We had a grand ole time. Then she entered. Tweaked out. Crying. Screaming into a phone that was not hers. It was special.

Before we left the parking lot, David and I had the following exchange through our respective car windows:

David: (honks)
Brynne: (rolls down window) Yes?
David: Were you named after the sound that a lawn mower makes? You know BRRNNNNBRNNNBRNNNNBBBBRRRRNNNNN!!!!!!!
Brynne: (looking at David like crazy person that he is) Um....no. Not at all.
Caitlin and Marisa: (laughing uncontrolably)
David: Are you sure?
Brynne: Yes.
David: Okay. Bye.
Brynne: Bye.

Then Marisa drove me home and we chatted about life and such.

All around good night. Plus I have a clean bathroom. We'll see how long that lasts...I think until the roommate shaves.

Wednesday

2009-01-07T15:20:00.000-08:00

Today is Wednesday and like many Wednesdays since I've moved to the LBC, I'm going to get hookah with two of my oldest and bestest girls. To simply say that I love Caitlin and Marisa is the greatest understatement known to my tiny pea-sized brain. These two girls can offer me the insight that I'm not so damn alone in my crazy sad, alone feelings. Occassionally, I have felt that the three of us know each other better than anyone of us and that makes me feel like I'm part of something bigger than me. And, really, when it comes down to it, isn't that all anyone could ask for?

because......

2009-01-05T11:34:00.000-08:00

On the day after the fabulous Donovan McNabb and the Philadephia Eagles Offensive and Defensive lines take themselves into the second week of the post season, I am feeling GOOD. I'm back at work after two weeks off and it's strange. It's like the first day of school. While I was on vacation we were moved to a new building with shiny new cubicles (for I am a cube dweller). The new cubes are about a foot shorted than our old cubes and a good 14" of that height is taken up by CLEAR glass. This essentially means that I can see from my cube at one end of the row clear to the empty cube on the other end of the row. Luckily no one is in the cubes immediately surrounding me. So: Bonus!

I got here around 6am. I woke up at 4:30am. I think I finally tricked my brain into letting me sleep around 1:30am. Strangely, I am not in the least bit tired. Just thirsty...still thirsty from New Year's Eve debauchery.

On that note, here is my list of "resolutions":

1. Don't drink booze unless there is sufficient foodage on the tummy.
2. Document my life via the internet beyond using Facebook and MySpace (more so the former than the latter).
3. Get into a place where I am willing to tolerate being in a relationship. (I think this will be the toughest since I don't see my value currently.)
4. Cook more. Bake more.
5. Smile more. Laugh more.
6. (and final) Be Present when I am somewhere. I think that's the greatest thing we can do for our loved ones.

happy new stuff and junk!

2009-01-02T19:39:00.000-08:00

First off:

Dear Whatever is attempting to camp out in my throat:

STOP IT!

thanks!
b.

Second:
I am going to attempt to actually post in this more than once in a blue moon. I'll try at once a week for now.

Today, I made some delicious soup. Jamaican Red Bean Soup. I LOVE it! My whole apartment (all 4 rooms) smells scrumptious. I also threw down some Jiffy corn bread muffins in my new silicone muffin pan. They came out super moist.

Thoughts and such...

2008-11-26T15:04:00.000-08:00

I'm over the sad I've been feeling since Sunday. I'm done with it. I'm taking my dad's advice and saying "Aww, fuck 'em." That's what I'm doing.

Today, the last of my friends I graduated with is be turning 25. She's celebrating by getting tattooed and then having a shindig at her pop's house. Miss Marisa is probably one of my favorite people to sit around and kill time chatting with. Both of us are Chatty Cathy's and can dispose of hours with our witty banter. Add in one very special Caitlin and bam! hours lost. Marisa and Caitlin kind of defined my senior year in high school. That's all there is to it. I love them both dearly and would probably jump in front of a speeding train for either girl.

On another note, tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I love the holidays. This will be the first Thanksgiving not spent in the fine company of my darling family. I will be spending it with a friend from work and various and sundry other folks. I'm looking forward to it. I'm going to make some Monkey Bread. This is something I used to beg my mom to make every year at the holidays. She stopped making it quite a long time ago but it's still one of my favorites. I'll let you know how it turns out!

Misunderstandings

2008-11-13T01:32:00.000-08:00

I got a call tonight around 10pm from a friend who I haven't hung out with in over a year. He was out with another friend of ours, who I have known for longer. I went because they both got on the phone and said that they wanted to see me and hang out. I went because I miss my boys. I miss the ease of hanging out with men. It's so signficantly different than hanging out with girls. Guys don't give in to nonsense. They just don't. Por exemplo:

My friend comes to me and says can I use your phone to call my girlfriend. I say yes with very little thought beyond "this is one of my oldest friends and he needs to use my phone". Well he gets in trouble with the girlfriend from calling from my phone. Apparently, he's betrayed her by hanging out with me. Which quite honestly crossed my mind before I left my apartment. I figured that it was fine. So, now he's in deep shit over some silliness.

I feel like I've done a significant amount of growing up in the past year and a few months. I just figured that everyone else who was around before that did the same. I guess I was wrong. I think that being 25 going on 26 I don't have the need to dwell in pettiness. No, I don't really care for this girl who is dating my friend but I don't think that's important. I think, if she is making him happy that's what's important. I've told him this on several occassions about girls he's dated. That's the philosophy I am currently trying to live by. Follow your bliss.

I'm trying to do that. I don't want someone to call me beautiful and thinks it's a done deal. It's not. I need more than that. I'm sorry. Call me picky or fickle or finicky. I don't really care; all apply.

Mostly, I'm upset that I got someone in trouble with someone else and I didn't mean it. I just heard "I need to use your phone" and didn't hesitate. That's the kind of person I am striving to be and for that I apologize.

Seriously?

2008-11-06T11:44:00.000-08:00

So I'm feeling like talking about anything beyond the election is trite and unnecessary....BUT:

Last night I went to the Carrie Underwood concert at the Nokia Theather in Downtown Los Angeles with three of my best girlfriends, my best friend's mom, her daughter and her boyfriend. We had a great time. My friend's little one just turned 4 on Oct. 24 and she LOVE LOVE LOVES Carrie. She sang her little heart out until she passed out from exhaustion. One thing I noticed that has colored my opinion of Ms. Underwood was this video they showed about 1/3 of the way through the concert. The video showed her winning all the awards she's won, winning American Idol, and doing all of the good that she has done with her new found fame. The problem is this: I always thought that she was a humble, small-town girl because that is what they want you to believe. Her shameless "look at how great I am" video rubbed me the wrong way. I just feel like it was mostly unnecessary and self-gratifying. Is that going to make me stop listening to her? Probably not. I listen to lots of music by people that I wouldn't be friends with, so that's nothing new.

On the flip side in 8 days I'll be going to see the fabulous Mr. Ben Folds at the Wiltern Theater. I would totally be friends with Ben. He's super nice. When I met him in 2001 he was so nice and super nervous. He forgot the words to Brick at the meet and greet. We reminded him. He was pleased that people knew the words to his song better than him. When I saw him last summer at the Holly(weird) Bowl he got on top of the piano to play it. The man is awesome and I want to go get snacks with him and talk about dinosaurs. I'm excited.

I found them

2008-11-05T10:26:00.000-08:00

The words, they are here! Last night this great nation elected it's first African-American president. To be able to say that I am an American has never meant more to me. The fact stands that changes need to be made and that Barack Obama will be at the forefront of those changes.
I work in a predominately Republican work-place. I wish I didn't know that. I wish that it didn't matter but it does. That I heard someone offering their condolences to another employee bothers me. Of course, I can't rightly know what my reaction would have been if John McCain had won. I think I would have been crying tears of sorrow last night instead of joy.
I'm glad I live in a country that is ready to embark on a new path. I woke up this morning and said to myself "It's a new day." That essentially sums up how I'm feeling.
On the flip side, I am appalled that Prop. 8 passed. I am horrified to live in a state that has an amendment in the constitution that discriminates against a group of people. I like to believe that this country has come along way and in many ways we have. But to think that there are people in this country that don't have the same rights as others bugs the hell out of me. How can I be so proud and yet so ashamed at the same time.?
For me last night was bittersweet. Yes, I am glad that Obama won. I am proud that this country made the right decision. But I'm also so sad that California has chosen to oppress a group of people. It's not protecting marriage or children or religious freedom; it's using those things to discriminate against others. That is the problem.

I have no words

2008-11-04T21:25:00.000-08:00

I cannot accurately express how proud I am of the this country. We have our first Black/African-American President of the United States of America and I have no words.

Decisions

2008-11-03T09:13:00.000-08:00

So I've been trying to cool my rage at people who are voting yes on Proposition 8. I mean really trying. I've tried to understand their side of it beyond the God hates gays and the our precious children will be scarred arguments. All it's been leaving me with is that they don't have anything to stand on beyond these arguments. People are using their religions and their children to justify their bigotry and hatred. I think the commercial narrated by Samuel L. Jackson says it best in that it displays the Great State of California's misguided views of "the other".
To take away anyone's rights is one of the worst things that can be done. Speaking as a black woman I cannot espouse anything that supports discrimination or bigotry of any group. The same God the "Yes on 8" people frequently quote also said that we are called to love our neighbors as we love ourselves and that all people are made equal in his sight. I can't possibly judge anyone's choices, lifestyle or anything of that nature. That's NOT my job. My duty as a Christian is to love the Lord God and to love my neighbor as myself. That is what I'm supposed to do.
My mom always says that you shouldn't judge someone unless you are prepared to be judged in that same fashion. I don't want to be judged for the way I live my life. I don't want to be judged for how I was born. I don't want to be judged for the choices and mistakes that I have made. The only person I'm prepared to have make judgment calls on me is God and last time I checked I'm not standing at the gates yet.

Life Goals List

2008-10-29T08:43:00.000-07:00

This is my list of things I would like to accomplish within my lifetime. I most certainly hope I can complete it:

Watch all 32 professional football teams play at their home stadiums (2 down, 30 to go).
Get Master's Degree in Social Work
Find the forever kind of love
Sell (at least) one photo
Go to Greece
Make a Wedding Cake
Visit Jamie and family in Washington, D.C.
See Jakob Dylan/The Wallflowers live
Get a dog and house train it
Raise $25,000 for a charity
Figure out if I'm going to get my JD

That's all I can think of now... I'll be back when there are more.

Edit to add:

Get certificate in Pastry
Own house (doesn't have to be big or anything, just mine)

stood-up

2008-08-14T08:36:00.000-07:00

for the first time EVER in my life i was stood-up last night. he didn't call. i haven't heard from him since Tuesday. what a jackass. here's my list of possible rational explanations that caused him not to call:

1. he's an asshole who only wanted to get into my pants and upon discovering that, ha, that wasn't going to happen he decided i wasn't worth his time.

2. he's an asshole.

3. he went to the bathroom. dropped his cell in the toilet and couldn't call me because his phone is dead and he can't get a new one until the weekend. which of course begs "why not just send me a facebook message?" well he didn't because his Internet is down so he can only go online at work and work has been crazy crazy crazy. which leads to:

4. he's been soooo very busy with his crazy crazy crazy job that he can't get a moment to shoot me a text that says he's super busy and wasn't going to be able to make it.

5. he's an ASSHOLE.

i think the worst part is that i liked him. there was nothing really wrong with him that i couldn't deal with. he was great. oh well. maybe he'll show back up in my odd little life.

but I've sworn off dating. I'm DONE. so i guess if i hear from him I'm going to tell him that sure we can hang out but i am going to call him on his standing up of the Brynne.

the curse of ben folds

2008-08-04T09:17:00.000-07:00

The man to my left and I have had an interesting run. Everytime I have gone to see Ben Folds the friend I would take with me wouldn't last much longer as my friend.

The first person I took to see Ben was my first college roommate Andrea. This was probably the best Ben experience I've had to date. I got to meet him which was awesome! About a month later we requested a room change and I moved in with Crazy Lexi (I don't talk to her either) and that was that. I never spoke to her again.

The second person I took to see Ben was my friend Christy, from Crossroads (the on capus coffee shop we both worked at). This was a pretty great night. Our friendship went sour after the school year was over. She just kind of dropped out of my life. I don't miss her at all. She was an anorexic and wouldn't admit it.

The last person I took to see Ben was my ex-boyfriend, Zack. We were working on being friends (with benefits). He really wanted to see Ben; I ALWAYS want to see Ben. It was at the Bowl. Ben sang "Bitches Ain't Shit" and the old people in front of us cringed the whole time. It was really a good night. Two weeks later Zack and I had the fight to end all fights. I told him I hated him (it was true). I don't hate him anymore. I don't feel anything towards him anymore.

This time around, I'm seeing Ben all by my lonesome. It's the only thing that makes sense. It'll be me and Ben and it'll be amazing. I like all the friends I have right now and don't feel like sacrificing anyone to the curse. So that's how it is. That's where it's at. Ben Folds + Brynne = special good times (by special good times I mean "losing friends who kind of sucked anyway").

the thing is...

2008-06-25T10:24:00.000-07:00

so george carlin died on sunday and i'm sad. in fact, i cried while sitting in my cubicle when i read it on monday. i couldn't finish the article because i was crying. the grandfather of one of the guys at work passed away yesterday and he looked spectacularly saddened. my grandmother has been gone for 6 years this month (i miss her like it was yesterday). death is something that we all see in our lifetimes. these amazing people who teach us and help us to grow and make us laugh and allow us to cry pass on and we are never the same. i'm feeling amazingly uninspired this week. i feel like i have nothing to contribute. i need to make a change. i'm turning into someone else everyday. why not push the envelope a little.

bang bang

2008-06-21T21:31:00.001-07:00

these are some bangles that i have had for a while. i never wear them. i hate jewelry. i don't know why i bought them.

warped tour 2008

2008-06-20T23:32:00.000-07:00

I'm not really happy with anything I took today. But we all have off days, don't we?

sunshine

2008-06-20T00:13:00.000-07:00

i like that you can't tell that there is liquid in this glass. it looks like some sort of weird sun thing.

rocks

2008-06-18T22:05:00.000-07:00

2008-06-17T19:39:00.000-07:00

I took these at the park across the street from my house. I'm testing out this "Digital Macros" business because, truth be told, I don't know what the hell it's for. I like the results though.

the plan, part ii

2008-06-17T09:34:00.000-07:00

so dig it. i forgot to say that i would be posting a NEW picture everyday. so that means i have to get off my lazy butt and go take at least one picture a day. give the camera and my eyes a workout.

"Lily of the Nile"

2008-06-16T18:31:00.000-07:00

Agapanthus africanus in front of the house. I hate these stupid flowers but I liked the way it looked against the sidewalk with the water spots from my dad watering the grass.

testing........

2008-06-16T08:01:00.000-07:00

So um... the plan is that i'm going to post at least one picture a day to this blog. that's the plan. that's all i'm writing.